Your Long Island wedding day will be a crazy whirlwind of an experience from start to finish. Besides the pressure of actually getting married, the sheer number of people you’re tasked with greeting is enough to make your head spin.
What you might fail to realize right now as you are deeply ensconced in the planning process, is that when your wedding finally does roll around, it will go by in a flash. Sometime during the goodbyes at the reception’s catering venue, you’ll realize that it’s actually over—and all that planning hopefully culminated in a night that won’t soon be forgotten by anyone in attendance.
But as you’re basking in the afterglow of your wedding, and spending some romantic quality time with your partner at your honeymoon, remember that you have one more intricate task to complete: The wedding thank-you cards.
Yes, you will likely thank your guests at the wedding itself, and probably also on social media the day after, but mailing a thoughtfully crafted “thank you” to each of your guests is the final component of the wedding etiquette package. It might sound daunting when you have anywhere between 50 to 150 (or more!) thank-you notes to send out, but every guest at your wedding—whether they gave you a gift or not—should get a physical thank-you card.
Fret not—when you plan ahead, it can be a truly fun and heartening process. In the spirit of lessening the pressure of wedding planning, let’s talk about some of the steps you can take to ensure your thank-you card process isn’t a thankless effort.
*Quick disclaimer: Some might say you have up until one year to send out your thank-you notes, but let’s put an end to that pervasive rumor right now. Proper wedding etiquette dictates thank-you cards be mailed out one to three months after the nuptials.
Make It Part Of Wedding Planning
As stated above, you’ll want to start mentally conceiving your thank you cards well before the wedding actually takes place. In fact, the best time to prepare is while designing your wedding invitations. Yes, that early! This will help you create a cohesive theme across your wedding stationary that can thread the pre-wedding excitement to the post-wedding bliss.
Stay Organized
You know that lengthy list with the names of people you plan on inviting to your wedding? The one that is covered in scribble, cross outs, and eraser marks? Convert that crude draft to a file on your computer and email to yourself more times than you think is necessary, no matter how many times your guest list changes. Having a detailed and coherent accounting of your guest list will not only help with planning the wedding, but it will also assist you when it’s time to sit down and get to work on your thank-you cards. Also, while going through your guest list after the wedding, jot down the gift given by each loved one so that you can personalize the thank you that much more.
Yes, Personalize The Thank Yous
While the general message can remain consistent, you should individualize your notes, even just a little bit. Besides, you wouldn't send identical thank-you messages to both your parents and your second cousin—as such, personalizing wedding thank-yous is a more natural way of expressing your gratitude to everyone who attended your special day. Again, the general message can remain the same, but one tip for individualizing your note is to mention how to plan to use the gift they gave you.
Don’t Write Them All At Once
Rather than chaining yourself to a desk and attempting to get all the thank-you notes done in one sitting, write them in batches. Try setting aside about 30 minutes every night devoted to writing your wedding thank-you cards. This will guard against burnout and keep the project a positive and sentimental experience, rather than the alternative of having it feel like homework. Don’t forget that these notes are from both you and your new partner—so don’t forget to also sign their name!
Get The Right Stationery, The Perfect Stamps
Here’s the part where you can stretch your creativity and really make a visual statement about what sets you apart as a couple. You can invest in some high-end stationery with a unique design or you can completely personalize your notes with your first names or even a wedding monogram. But get fancy with more than merely the note itself. Find a good pen, like, a really good pen—for example, rollerball pens make for some incredible penmanship. And lastly, pick up a roll of forever stamps, and browse a bit to see if there are any designs that match your overall wedding thank-you card motiff.
To help you in the thank-you card process and as part of their event planning services, The Watermill provides discounted thank-you card options, presented by event coordinator Samantha. Inquire within to find out more!
